One told me, ‘I went to a funeral a week in the 80s,’ as he fixed a red AIDS Day ribbon to his shirt. I enjoy speaking to older customers for their wisdom, although some of them think we still sell books or magazines with escorts’ numbers on the back.
The spectrum of people I meet is magnificent and I love that I can have banter with customers – it relaxes them when they visit. The other half – light and comfortable – is for the sex toys, like dildos, buttplugs, massagers and masturbators. We’re really not a back alley cupboard with a chain link doorway.
First, it’s brightly colourful, full of clothes and gaudy gifts – like penis-shaped everything, rainbow flags, coasters, magnets and wind-up willies. Our shop is divided with an open *ahem* passage. I was taught to help customers enhance their sex lives – from the difference between silicone and water-based lube, to the variety of toy materials and why gays value underwear brands instead of a Primark three-pack (it’s because of their loyalty to a brand, the fits being better, materials nicer, and it’s a little more sexy in their eyes). I was also surprised to discover porno DVDs sell well despite the internet. I discovered how many types of dildos there are, as well as the importance of bendiness, firmness, curves and straightness. I was amazed that ‘aromas’ are the best selling products, so I learned chemical names like pentyl nitrate. On my first shift, everyone was welcoming, sarcastic, lovely and savage all at once. Thankfully, I got the job at the end of the interview, although my colleagues still take the piss out of me for wearing a blazer, and sliding my fake nose ring off to scare my future boss. On the day of the interview, I panicked on a street corner before breathing, entering the store, and nervously saying ‘hi’. We will be splitting the cash with a grassroots charity closer to home. To celebrate 50 years of Pride, .uk has teamed up with Kyiv Pride to raise money for their important work in Ukraine.ĭespite war raging around them, Kyiv Pride continue to help LGBTQ+ people, offering those in need shelter, food and psychological support.